Thursday, January 26, 2012


Hello ... Yes ... Amit here ... Who? ... Don’t say ... Aditi!!! Hey ... How are you Aditi? It’s a pleasant surprise ... Or I can say it’s the ‘deadliest’ surprise I’ve ever received ... C’mon ... Where are you? ... Or ... forget that ... Where from you get my number? ... Or forget that even ... How the hell you are calling me? Or should I replace the word ‘hell’ in earlier sentence ... It’s really ‘heaven’ ... Ohhhhhh ... I should stop this blabbering ...Let me go to my first question ... “How are you?”!!!
Me??? ... ‘Nice’ as always ... or ... you may say ‘Confused’ as always but pretending to be the coolest of rational most a##hole in this side of earth!!!
Yessss ... I know you were right in those days ... But tell me ... How was it possible to admit this ‘fact’ in those days? Even if I tried to admit, it’s the fu*king male chivalry which played as a spoilsport and forbade me to not!!! Haaa haaa haaa ...
Yaaa ... yaaa ... I know ... You are not ready to admit the fact that I was male ‘enough’ ... But that’s the gender advantage you will always have ... All girls will be girly ‘enough’ at all time ... Whether be in the wilder side or in a calmer side!!!
C’mon ... I know I was shy enough to start even a conversation with any girl ... But that doesn’t mean I was too eccentric ... An average Bengali Medium Middle Class lad couldn’t do more than that ...
Yes, I know, you were also from Bengali Medium background ... But ... You know, girls are different, they can take infinite time to do simplest things in the earth, again, may do an impossible within a wink of an eye!!!
Yes Madam, though my report-card will not show a single girl in my pocket, but, one thing I must claim, I have observed them to the fullest ... You can say that’s not enough to know a girl’s mind, but that’s not my personal incapability!!!
Marriage???!!! Good heaven ... That’s not my cup of tea!!!
Arrre yaaar ... Don’t get dirty ... I am perfectly alright, but don’t have faith on myself whether I am capable of carrying a relationship. You know, you were right in those days, I am too snobbish to perform daily trivial emotional activities in life. I am a born escapist, who closes all the doors of the mind whenever there are some hints of the trouble brewing over any relationship.
You tell me ... I heard you are greatly performing as a perfect homemaker with Amartya? You know, many a times I tried to imagine you draping a Saree, wearing bangles like Shankha and Churi in your hand, sporting a red bindi in the forehead, wiping out the last drop of sweat from your nose using the aanchal, cooking daily meal for your Pati-dev ... But, every time those imaginations fell flat ... I mean, those who have seen Aditi in School or College, I challenge, they can’t even think in this way ... But you have made that impossible possible ... You know, I have told you earlier, ONLY a girl can do that!!!
Again you are going into dirtier side Man ... You girls should know all ‘imaginings’ are not ‘fantacizing’!!! In my life, I was never able to think something raunchy about the girls with whom I fell in love...
Noooooooooo way, I am not telling I was in love with you!!!
Noooooooooo ... I am not blushing in this side of telephone, or even if, it’s very natural in response with the faltu words you are uttering!!! You were not this kind of ‘daring’ in school or college days!!!
Ok ... It’s my turn to hit you below the belt ... And don’t make any wrong interpretation of this earlier phrase ... How’s Anjan? Have you forgotten him totally after your marriage with Amartya?
I know where he is. Last time I saw him was four years ago at Howrah station waiting for Viswabharati Express. He is doing some kind of research on ‘Baul’ in Birbhum District. He told me it had given him opportunity to find solace even in the darkest state of mind. He also told me, he can spend rest of his life with the memory of the relationship you both had. I thought it was very foolish on his part. But now, with more knowledge about the summit of every relationship, I have also started to think in that way.
Hey ... again in last week I saw him on television ... He has grown bush like beard in his face, with a black thick rimmed spectacle matching the mood, and a tilak in his forehead, discussing about the solution of ‘Jangolmohol’ problem in some stupid news channel!!!
I think he is going to be a politician or Anna Hazare in your love ... See, what impact can you have in someone’s life!!!
That’s OK. But tell me one thing, does relationship end that abruptly? Don’t you have any feeling for him at the deepest darkest corner of your subconscious? At any point of time, when The Great Software Honcho Amartya, does not live up to your expectation, don’t you think of him, don’t you think of that down to earth simpleton Anjan, who was even ready to carry your shoes during our college time rainy seasons?
I know, you can’t answer better than that. We are human being after all.
Meeee? Nope ... I told you earlier. All of my loves are one sided. Those were initiated strictly from my side and ended there. Or rather, were remained as open chapters in my life.
Who? Arundhati? No man, you know where she is right now? Doing her Post Doc from MIT USA. You know, you and other people always accused me of being an Aantel (Intellectual) all the time, but when it came the turn of Arundhati, she thought me too mediocre in comparison with her Aantlaami (Intellectualism)!!! Haaaaa haaaa. You remember those lines from Nazrul which you used to recite in School? Where Muslims used to think the Poet as “Kaafer” (Converted from Islam, mostly Hindus) and Hindus thought him as “Paat NeRe” (fundamentalist Muslim). I was always remained in both the life and never could balance my life.
Anamika? Hey ... forget that innocent child who was forced to propose me after being badly motivated by you people after her breaking up with Anish. I must tell that was a rarest of rare experience of being proposed in my life, but I had done the right thing to her by saying ‘NO’. I am sure; she has understood her foolishness later in her life.
Hey, you know, I have seen her one or two months back with her husband in City Centre, Salt Lake... and you know what? She was even carrying her child in her arm. I felt too embarrassed to face her. But her face was telling she is happy.
I know. I will remain single. But I also know you are jealous about my being single darling. Grass is always greener on the other side.
Ok ... Ok ... I will save your number and inform you the day I find someone ‘special’.
Ok ... Bye ... Take Care ... And listen ... I won’t mind if you call me once or twice in a year, haaaa haaaa!!! Look, someone has become ‘daring’ after talking to you. Ok ... Chaalo ... Bye!!!

Saturday, January 21, 2012

২৩শে জানুয়ারী

চলো হে, এবারে শেষ সময়ের প্রস্তুতি নিই
খুব কম সময়েই সময়ের সাথে ঠোকাঠুকিতে অবসন্ন মন
বাক্স, বিছানা, মনের দোর তালাবন্ধ করে
গভীর বোবা রাতগুলোর দীর্ঘশ্বাস শুনে সময় কাটাই এখন।

ছেলেটা বড় বেশী পেয়ে গেছিল ছোট্টো জীবনে
একলা ভালোবাসার স্পর্ধা, বাতাসে আনন্দ, সহমর্মী হাত
তুচ্ছ ছোটো অনূভূতি ভরা পাহাড়প্রমাণ গর্ব
একটা বই, ছবি বা গানের কোলে কাটিয়ে দেয়া পুরোটা রাত।

কথা বলতে বলতে সাথে থাকার ভরসা দিয়েছিল
সঙ্গ না ছাড়ার অহংকারে সাথী’র হাত ছেড়েছিল যখন
বোঝেনি বাস্তবকে ছাড়িয়ে যাবার স্বপ্নই সার
দুনিয়া-য় অতীত ভরসা বা অবলম্বন-এর শেষ প্রয়োজন।

নিঃশ্বাসে মিশেছে বিষ? ছটফট করছে তাই আপন?
তবুও কেন ছোট্ট একটা ছেলে ঘাড়ে মাথা রেখে ভালো থাকে
অথবা আর একটা মন উজাড় করে তার ভালোলাগা
বিষিয়ে যেতে যেতে এতগুলো মনের কোণ ছোঁয়া যেতে পারে?

রক্তাক্ত হাতে শীতল মৃত্যু’র অভিযোগ ঘাড়ে নিয়ে
দিব্যি বেঁচেবর্তে থাকে যারা তারা বোধহয় ক্ষণজন্মা বিচক্ষণ
কারো কারো মাথায় এ বোঝা মৃত্যুর চেয়েও ভারী
শেষ হবার প্রস্তুতি নেবার ভাবনা’ও বাড়ায় অনুশোচনা’র ওজন।

কিভাবে কাটবে রাত জানেনা দীর্ঘ এ অনভিজ্ঞ সন্ধ্যা
আচ্ছন্ন থাকার আড়ালে সত্যি গোপনের অভিনয় হয় রোজ
বারবার ভেসে আসা ঘৃণা তবু পেছন ছাড়েনা
ঘুম ভাঙ্গা মাঝরাত্তিরে ভয় অশরীরি হত্যার অভিযোগ।

কে তুই? অহর্নিশি জিজ্ঞাসা’য় বিরক্ত বিপন্ন সত্ত্বা
অহংকারী? হত্যাকারী? ব্যাভিচারী? অথবা কোন প্রতারক?
বারে বারে ফিরে যাওয়া উত্তরেরা যতই নিরীহ
ততটা স্বাভাবিক বা শান্ত নয় তোমার ছোঁয়ায় নরক।

নিজের জিজ্ঞাসা হারিয়েছে পথ বা পথের সন্ধান
অভিশাপে অন্ধ মন প্রতিবন্ধী জীবন আজো দিশেহারা
ভোর হবে বলে জাগা রাত দুঃস্বপ্নে আঁধার-ই দেখে
শেষ সময়ের প্রস্তুতি নেবে কিভাবে ভাবে রাতজাগা তারা।।